December 10, 2012

  • And More Damn Donuts!

    TALES FROM THE BRAT FARM

    The Beast has some sort of a mental block about starting to make donuts at a decent time.  No, I take that back.  He DID start his first batch at a somewhat decent time but he made such a major mess of the kitchen, there was no doing anything else.  He started on telling me all about how superfine powdered sugar is so much different from 10X powdered sugar that I told him to just go and do what he wanted because he would anyway.  He was throwing the 10X sugar into the blender to make it superfine.  **Roll eyes here**  I told him that 10X powdered sugar WAS superfine and he wanted to argue about it.  I tried to tell him that if it didn't say 10X, it hadn't been put through the *blender* 10X, unlike regular powdered sugar and he just wanted to argue.  I gave it up.  He slammed the door leaving my computer room.  He's such an adult.

    I refused to help him.  Okay, so maybe that wasn't so adult either but why give myself a headache when, if it doesn't make sense to him (he's so experienced at this), he comes over to read what I just told him.  No!  I don't need the high blood pressure, TYVM!  So, he tried to make these sour cream donuts.  After following the directions exactly (he swears he did and the book is obviously wrong and should be thrown away..), the batter was too gummy to even take out of the bowl.  It had to be scraped out.  It stuck to his hands and fingers.  He finally grabbed the flour and started adding flour to it until he actually could roll it out.  Then, when he had made the donut forms, they started to flake apart in the fryer.  I had to be a smartass and look in and say, *Oh!  Flaky!*    He didn't  appreciate the humor.

    I swear he made four or five trips to Walmart for different things.  Mostly ingredients but I also now own a new set of measuring cups (he threw the old set away...oh, and my measuring spoons, too).  Now he knows why I kept them even if I wasn't using them all the time.  He also read the directions that said the donut cutter was to be 2-1/2 inches.  The one he bought (he wanted BIG donuts) was almost a full inch bigger than that.  His sour cream donuts were to be cute with the smaller cutter.  Oh, oh...and he discovered also that the amount of time dough is left in the fridge is important, too.  He thought 15 minutes (OR SO) was enough.  When he left it in for the full half hour, guess what?  They actually WERE no longer the gummy mess he had earlier.  They were able to be rolled out.  They fried up without flaking apart.  They even looked like the picture of them in his recipe book. 

    Chewlee wanted no part of his donuts.  She wants the light, airy kind like crullers.  Real raised donuts.  She told the Beast she would have some when he makes *her* kind.  I just snickered.  She wouldn't even lick the beaters from the frosting he made.  I tried to get her to do it but she put the tip of her finger on the frosting, got a little sliver and licked it.  She then told him, *No, thank you.  I had enough.*

    Chewlee told me today that she found out something.  She said, *Santa knows when a grownup is mean to kids and guess what?  They don't get any presents then.*  She had this self-satisfied air about her when she told me that like she had finally found a defender of kids and that suited her feeling of fair play.  The kid was almost smug about it.  I told her, *Am I ever mean to you?*  She said, *Sometimes!*  She then caught herself and said, *But it's only when you aren't feeling good, Grandma.*  I had to smile when she said, *I know Santa is going to bring you some presents.  He's really nice!*  The kid is quick!  A little later, we were talking about names for some reason that I forget now.  But she said to me, *Some people call me 'smart ask'.  Is that a good name?*  As I rolled on the floor, she got mad at me because she didn't know why I was laughing so hard.  When I wouldn't explain to her, she told me she was going to tell Santa that I was being mean to her and I would be on his *bad* list.

    Well, I took my shower earlier than I normally do and that's why this is late.  Love you all.  Have a fantastic week and don't try to cram all your Holiday shopping in at once.  Take the time to enjoy yourself a bit.