July 12, 2012

  • Innocence

    TALES FROM THE BRAT FARM

    If there is one trait that I will hate to see Chewlee lose, it's her innocence.  How do I mean that?  I mean that she believes she can say what is on her mind without fear.   She doesn't have any real inkling about what is politically correct or unladylike or something you really hoped she had no inkling of.  She thinks it or feels it and it comes out in what she says to you.

    We forget that children really ARE innocents.  We often react incorrectly to something that a child might say without realizing that there is a real question there.....and an opportunity to teach.  I try very hard not to be *cranky* and just react to something Chewlee might say.  She has a mind of her own and will make statements that can shock you.  Like her telling her paternal grandfather that she has *two daddys*.  First of all, her biological father didn't really come into her life until her paternal grandfather forced him to come when the Princess got involved with Johnnycakes. 

    When I picked her up after her overnight stay with the grandfather (and the father was there), I knew they were trying to force-feed the fact that the biological father was her *daddy* down her throat.  But it was Johnnycakes that changed her diapers, drew her bath, got her ready for bed and even read her bedtime stories.  Even when she was two years old, she had questions and, thank God, I encouraged her to talk to me when she seemed preoccupied.  When she asked me about her *daddy* that her grandfather brought with her, I didn't deny he was her daddy.  Instead, I told her that she was sooooooo lucky to have TWO daddys.  The one in Florida and her daddy that loved her HERE.  She accepted that....and apparently, it still applies.  She sticks to that no matter what else is said.  Like I said, she had a mind of her own. 

    That in itself is a form of innocence.  There are no questions.  Okay, a grownup told her that this one person was her daddy but she knew she had another daddy that lived with her HERE.  When I made it okay to have TWO daddys, that was good enough for her.  That's just one example.  I see others almost every day.  There's a bit of guile in her, no doubts about that, but it's usually because she wants her own way on something that she knows she won't get.  But she will try anyway by going for it 'round about.

    The only reason she hasn't lost that yet is because both the Princess and I actually talk to her most of the time and tell her where she is right or wrong.  She will ask questions and sometimes she gets stubborn because it's not what she wants to hear.  But, lord, I love how she thinks about things.  She will watch programs with me (Discovery mostly or Animal Planet) and she asks interesting questions about the animals and sea life.  I bought some books for her on Nook and it reads them to her.  I will see her go back to a page several times until she thinks she understands it.  It's just a wonderful feeling to watch a  young mind at work.  It makes my heart beat just a little faster to think I am helping to expand that mind with some of the wonders of the world.

    Like I said, when she loses that, I will be saddened.  But I understand that it is also part of life.  We've all gone through it in one way or another.  I'm just one of the people that hope to protect her from some of the worst ways you can lose your innocence....and keep her from getting hit by a bus.    But I will enjoy her as long as I can, god willing. 

    Love you all.  Have a great week and distribute some smiles along the way.