September 29, 2011
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Apologies…..
TALES FROM THE BRAT FARM
Sorry this is up so late but Buttmunch called me earlier today and I wondered if I should mention it or not. Her reason for calling me, I mean. She was very upset. It seems she heard from the Golden Child today. Now some of you that have been following my blog know who that is but for any new ones, she is the oldest child who was full of promise when she was young. She had good looks, an outgoing personality and a way with animals and insects that had to be seen to be believed. But then she got involved with drugs. To make a long story short, it was many years that the family, and especially me, tried to believe she really wanted to change.
All she really did, however, was use everyone that she could and she robbed us all blind to support her habit. The Princess was her daughter but the Beast and I raised her from when she was very small. We finally adopted her because we knew there was no hope for a successful reuniting with her mother. Her mother is still on drugs and homeless. Unfortunately, she also gets her money for her drugs and temporary dwellings through the oldest profession in the world. Not a pretty picture. I think I was the last one to finally open my eyes and really SEE what was happening and I was given the book on Tough Love. I can’t tell you how many nights I cried for my beautiful, lost daughter but I had to admit that she didn’t love any of us. She only loved what we could give to her or she could steal from us when we weren’t expecting it. We loved her but it was not returned. She didn’t even love her beautiful daughter enough to straighten out her life. Now that daughter wants nothing to do with her. She doesn’t even want her to know where she is living.
After I got over my surprise that she had called Buttmunch, I asked how she had even gotten her phone number. Buttmunch had told her friends living in the area where we knew she was last that, if they ran across her, to call because Buttmunch wanted to know how her sister was doing. It was not a good conversation and, when Golden Child asked about her daughter, Buttmunch said to her, *Why do you want to know? When did you ever really care?* At that, the Golden Child called her a bad name (starts with a *C*) and threw the phone to Buttmunch’s friend then ran out of the bar she was in, crying.
Buttmunch was crying as we talked. She loves her sister. Hell, we all do but we just cannot trust her any more. Any positive moves must come from HER and she will have to expect that we will be disbelieving and cautious if it happened at all. However, there’s no sign of that happening. I know why the Golden Child ran out crying. She will be able to return later on and lots of people will want to know why she was upset. She will milk that for all it’s worth and get drinks and cigarettes from it at least. She was always conniving.
But my heart breaks every time I think about her being homeless and the lifestyle she has chosen to live. She usually gets arrested during the winter so we don’t have to worry about her being found, dead of hypothermia under some bridge. She’s in Florida but it still gets cold enough for that to happen. Either that or someone might kill her and we won’t find out about it unless one of Buttmunch’s friends sees the newspaper article about a woman found dead in some dumpster and they use one of her arrest photos to identify her.
I hurt for Buttmunch who really misses her sister. Even though there’s anger there, there’s also love and concern. She could have a nice life but she’s getting up in years and probably isn’t in the best of health. Buttmunch just can’t understand WHY the Golden Child doesn’t love her family the same way we love her. I’m clueless in that. She’s bipolar so that might have something to do with it. I’m just not sure. I still say a prayer for her sometimes and ask that God watch over her and keep her safe from harm. I know no one can protect her from herself but I do hope no one else harms her. Both of the Golden Child’s brothers don’t talk about her much because they held out a helping hand to her but, because rehab was a condition, she refused. That broke their hearts. It’s broken all our hearts and especially the Beast. He loved her very much as the first child. When she got involved with drugs and other things he had no use for, he totally turned his back on her and it froze his heart from caring for many years. Me? I’m a mother. I love all my kids and wish with all my heart that she could be saved and that I would live to see it. A useless wish, I know.
Love you all. Have a wonderful day.
