February 19, 2010

  • THE BEAST...CHANGES HIS MIND AND GETS A HEAD COLD


    TALES FROM THE BRAT FARM

      Those two things have nothing to do with each other.  The Beast woke up with a bad head cold so the trip to Sam's Club was off...for another day.  He's been doctoring himself with Theraflu or Nyquil, not sure which.  I don't care as long as he finally empties out his nasal cavities.  He's been complaining all day, saying, *How big are those cavities anyway??  Mine must be HUGE!*  Yeah, he's a MAN.  No one has ever..........  *Sigh*

    I told him if he still wasn't feeling good tomorrow, guess what?  I would pour something down his throat, make him get in the car and *I* would drive but we are going to Sam's Club.

    He changed his mind about buying the AK-47 now.  He wants to get the fancier version of one of the rifles he already has.  I think it has a stainless steel barrel and fancy stock.  I really don't care.  Just the idea of having one of those in the house bothers me.  I'm sure that *whomever's list we are on now* probably thinks he has the technical know-how to convert it into an automatic.  Or knows someone who does.  No way.  What the heck are two old people like us going to do with something like that?  Anyway, I feel better about him buying the fancier one than buying that one.  I watch too much TV and even what I have seen on *48 Hours* makes me cringe.

    I remember a long time ago when I had both my girls living at home.  I think they were about 13 & 14 at the time.  Both of them were gorgeous and always caught people's attention wherever we went.  The Beast was on one of his three-day trips to the Bahamas that he took with his cousin to go fishing.  I had four kids at home and I didn't like the way his three day trips went anyway.  It truly WAS a *boy's weekend* thing. 

    They would end up not bothering to get a hotel or motel room and live on the boat.  Why not?  They had the cuddy cabin to sleep in.  They could pee over the side.  There was a portapotty in the cuddy cabin.  He even had a sterno stove if they wanted to prepare hot food.   I packed a huge amount of food for them and packed it into the ice chest.  The darn thing was HUGE.  They had ice coming out of their ears if they didn't open it up too often and his cousin was in charge of making them coffee.  I swear, they could have stayed out for a week.  But, I digress......

    It was a Saturday night and all the kids were home and tucked into bed.  I was in the living room, watching TV with the lights out when I saw a figure sneaking around my house out back.  At first, I thought someone was cutting through to walk along the canal there but then I heard noises on the side of the house.  I got up and crept over to my door into the garage and could see someone turning the door handle.  I almost had a heart attack right then.  Someone was looking for an easy way into the house.

    I went and got my Beretta out of my bedroom, put the clip into it, then started turning on the lights as I walked back to my living room.  All the curtains were open, including the one covering our oversized patio doors.  They were the kind that slid out of sight so you could open up the living room and patio area to each other.  Beyond that was our pool.  It was all screened in back there but anyone could have kicked in the screens and gained access.  I put the Beretta in plain sight on the coffee table, within easy reach.  Every single light in my house was turned on and stayed that way.  I figured if someone wanted in there bad enough, they should know I was armed and ready for them.  I stayed up all night long like that, barely noticing anything on TV.  When it got light and my oldest son was up, we walked along the perimeter of the property, checking all the bushes then I finally came in the house and went to bed for a few hours.

    The strange thing was that, as I sat there, faced with the idea of possibly having to shoot someone, I wasn't really sure if I could.  I thought about all the possible scenarios.  I mulled them over in my mind several times and then I came to the decision that I COULD shoot someone if they invited themselves forcefully into MY home.  It was a strange feeling because I knew I would probably be sick over it but, faced with the alternatives, I WOULD do it.

    I knew I wouldn't bother with trying to wound them.  They tell you in the classes that you either go for the chest area or the head.  I figured a .38 was a big enough weapon to aim for the chest.  I did well at the shooting range.  All I had to do was try to keep from shaking with fright if it became an actuality.  But, I found out that my classes and practice with the weapon had given me the confidence I needed that I didn't think I would shake at all.  It was a strange feeling to realize that about yourself.  I WOULD shoot rather than be violated that way. 

    It had been bad enough that we had been burglarized TWICE.  The first time, it was probably young kids (so thought the cops) because of the damage that was done but nothing was actually taken.  It was almost like some kids were pissed at my kids so they came in to destroy stuff.  The second time was different.  There was lots of stuff stolen.  The cops were like...DUH!  Believe it or not, through talking to various neighbors, the Beast actually found out who had done it and went to the home of the youngest person.  Some of the stuff was recovered but.....because WE had found the perp, guess what?  The cops said now it was a civil matter.  **THUD**  <== that's me, hitting the floor in shock.  So we got no satisfaction and what wasn't recovered was mostly stuff that insurance really couldn't pay for.  Some of the jewelry stolen (and never recovered) was of sentimental value and not truly worth more than a few hundred dollars each. 

    It was a real lesson for us.  After that, we had Brink's monitored service and didn't have another burglary while we lived in Florida.  Here, we don't worry about that.  We've pared down and given away some of the stuff that might tempt a burglar.  We live in a middle class area but out in the boonies.  We live simply.  Why would we have to worry about a home invasion or robbery?  Also, we have a huge doberman.  He IS good for something other than company.    Too bad most people don't know what a pussy cat he is.  He has rarely reacted suspicious of anyone.  I can think of only two instances where he has gone into his stance and started that low  pitched growl that means *Ut oh.....watch out!*

    Well, I need to get this posted before the new storm moves in and I lose my internet.  It's been sporadic today because we actually had a beautiful day.  It was bright, sunny and got up to 50 degrees here.  Then the clouds started in.  Oh well.  It was fun while it lasted.  Love you all and I wish you a fantastic day.  The Beast's favorite saying right now? *Be prepared for the worst but hope for the best.*